Piss arse

For a year now I've not received tax credits. The story behind that involve both slowness of my financial mind and stupidity of HM Revenue & Customs.

Really the story doesn't start until September, when I thought "Okay Kaitlyn is starting school now so I better phone the Tax Credit people and tell them about change of circumstances." In this case I was paying more for the childcare. When I did I got told that Kaitlyn was not in my care anymore! Hey, what? NOT in my care anymore! Not in MY care anymore!? Not in my care ANYMORE?!?!?! WHAT?

So I make a few phone calls, one of them to my beloved ex(barf)to see what has happened. She claims ignorance, so I phone them again. And it is true the money for that child is going nowhere and she is definitely not in my care anymore. And when I got told that I asked the lady:

Me: So according to your records, a 5 year old has moved out and is fending for herself in the big wide world?

Her: Well, sir there is nothing we can do about it at the moment, you just have to put an appeal through.

Me: No, wait just a moment. How can she NOT be in may care anymore? I mean I looking at her right now in MY living room!!

Her: Well, sir there is nothing we can do about it at the moment, you just have to put an appeal through.

Steam is forming on me now at this point.

Me: Okay I'll do that, but why was this not investigated further?

Her: According to my details we did tell you in May.

I check my records, and actually their right.

Me: But... why did you not maybe... uhh phone me?

Her: Well, sir there is nothing we can do about it at the moment, you just have to put an appeal through.

Me: Okay, okay. I get the picture. How long will the appeal take, usually?

Her: Well, sir there is noth... Up to 6 weeks.

Me: Okay, fine, I suppose I can wait that long. Send me the form please.

Her: Well, sir there is no... will do.

So hey, I get the form and write everything that I think needs to be put in there, like the minor detail of that Kaitlyn still lives with me. And I pay for the child care. And Oh yeah, She has been living with me, majority of the time, since the divorce.

So I wait.

And I wait.

Still waiting...

Finally got a letter, from HM Revenue & Customs. Saying that they'll be discussing it and getting to a final decision on 11th of February.

Discussing if she still lives with me or not? Why don't they come for a visit and have some coffee and cakes? What is there to discuss? How can they come to a decision about a thing like that?

But okay, I'll wait.

And I'll wait just a little bit longer.

Then 11th of Feb arrives. And...

...Nothing.

So I phone them again.

Me: What is happening?

Other Her: Sorry sir?

Me: So you should be! What is happening? I get told IN SEPTEMBER that it shouldn't take more then 6 weeks. I get a letter saying that final decision will be made on 11th of feb, it's now 15th. So what is happening?

Other Her: Sorry sir, I don't know what your talking about.

Me: Is this not HM Revenue & Customs?

Other Her: No, this Brazilian Embassy.

Me: Oops sorry.

Well get to HM Revenue and this correspondent says it can't be 6 weeks and the 11th of Feb was only an estimate!

Okay.

So me and my girlfriend decide to step into the offices of this respectable organization and talk to someone there. Very nice lady, who's jaw keeps falling off due to this story. So she tells me, contact the MP of this district.

His name SUPERHERO Ben Wallace of the Conservatives. I send him an e-mail and receive a reply the SAME day! So I send him another e-mail with a few more sordid details and the reply I got today:

"I am writing to let you know that I have now taken up your case with Mike Clasper, Chairman of HM Revenue and Customs."

And my only thought now? Wow, they actually do help people. There was me thinking that all that MP's do is swim a pool filled with champagne and custard on tax payers expense.

But no, he actually seems to help. And he's a TORY!

Wow.

Ah well. The story hasn't finished yet. All I can say is that Kaitlyn's school has been fantastic, and right now I feel guilty as hell that I owe them nearly 1500 quid in payment.